ECW Hardcore TV #3 20/04/1993

The Super Destroyers vs The Wolfman & Super Ninja

Really basic squash here. Wolfman, despite the name, is just a fat guy in jeans. One Destroyer does hit a nice enzuigiri, but then barely gets Wolfman up for a slam. Super Ninja doesn’t fare much better and gets pinned following a senton. Nothing to this.

Jimmy Snuka vs Tommy Cairo

This isn’t much better. Short match with Cairo working a headlock for a long time to start. Not in the fun way, where Mike Quackenbush can work five minutes of schtick around frustrating his opponent with a headlock, just Cairo holding a headlock for a long time. Cairo barely stays down for a piledriver, before a ref bump sees Johnny Hotbody interfere, laying out Cairo with a weapon to allow the Superfly splash to win.

Eddie Gilbert vs Glenn Osbourne

Gilbert decides to go for smoke and mirrors to make this bout work. Lots of fighting outside the ring to start, making it hilarious to hear ECW commentators bemoaning the use of a table as “not wrestling”. Gilbert is clearly holding Osbourne’s hand through this to make it interesting. Osbourne works a weak comeback, with a milky clothesline, before Gilbert pins him after a brass-knucks blow. Commentator Jay Sulli informs the referee however, and the ref reverses the decision after finding them in Gilbert’s tights. This leads to Snuka vs Osbourne for the TV title tonight, as if we need another Osbourne bout.

Rockin’ Rebel vs Frank Cody

Squash, after Rebel flies into a rage when Sandman’s valet Peaches gives him a slap instead of a kiss. Barely 30 seconds, though I liked Rebel’s match-winning spinebuster.

Glenn Osbourne vs Jimmy Snuka

Yeah, this really isn’t great. Osbourne can barely hit a hiptoss on Snuka. There’s a terrible ref bump, as Snuka has to guide Osbourne round to get into position to be pushed into the ref, and Gilbert returns to break up a pin, leaving Osbourne prone to the Superfly splash to win the ECW TV title for Snuka. Really poor.

ECW Hardcore TV #2

Glenn Osbourne vs Johnny Hotbody

I’d only seen Osbourne once before in 1999 CZW, where he’s a lot chunkier. This was basic, competent stuff, but I did enjoy a few things Hotbody did. Nice sequence where he avoided a shoulder charge and hit a fluid German suplex right away. Also enjoyed his flying shoulder tackle off the apron. The end sees a ref bump, followed by Hotbody lowblowing Osbourne and nailing a piledriver. For some reason, Hotbody decides to do a superplex, but gets distracted by an arriving Tommy Cairo and gets knocked down, which Osbourne follows with a shitty splash for 3.

Larry Winters & Tony Stetson vs Chris Michaels & Samoan Warrior

This was competently worked, but featured moments of terrible nonsense. Michaels worked most of the match as an overconfident stooge, which was pretty fun. I quite enjoyed some of the double teaming by Stetson and Winters that was quite fluid. A few baffling moments though – at one point Michaels is running the ropes and for no reason decides to skin the cat, whereupon he turns into a clothesline as his opponent had just been standing there waiting. The end was also a bit off – Samoan Warrior is in the match for maybe 30 seconds, gets hurled out and the faces throw Michaels back into the ring. Despite being very much the illegal man who had been brought back in against his will, Michaels gets taken out with a Death Sentence for the win.

The Sandman vs the Kodiak Bear

Ha ha, this was ridiculous. Seeing Sandman in his original gimmick of happy surfer is obviously hilarious, and his opponent looks like a hobo John Tenta. This was shit, as Kodiak Bear seems barely able to bump. Lots of very, very basic offence here, with Sandman going for armwringers and roll ups. Sandman hits a terrible missile dropkick and a worse slingshot shoulderblock, before locking in a Million Dollar Dream for the win.

Eddie Gilbert vs JT Smith

This starts at a much brisker pace than the rest of the show, as Gilbert rushes Smith sending him outside and brawling in the crowd. There’s a great camera shot where you see these two just disappearing into the darkness to fight. Loved the sleight of hand as Gilbert manages to crack Smith with the ring bell right behind the ref’s back. Smith makes a comeback, but misses a moonsault. The end sees Smith try a back suplex, but gets levelled with a loaded punch, Gilbert landing on top for the win. Best match on ECW so far.

Tommy Cairo vs Super Ninja

The Gilbert match would have been the perfect way to finish, but we instead get this JIP Cairo match. Very short, Cairo looks decent here with some nice fire, and I dug the ending as Ninja tried a splash in the corner, only to get caught and planted with a back suplex match for the win.